I hope you will enjoy yourselves as we talk about parenting and caregiving, the concerns we have as father, son and husband, and being sandwiched between caring for our own offspring and also our elders. We talk about how nurture in the environment helps to set values for our children, what it means living in an extended family nucleus, and the importance of communicating our thoughts and feelings when it comes to dealing with our respective parents, so that we can move forward together as a family unit.
Timestamp:
0.00 Introduction
0.20 Definition of Caregiving
1.45 Alex introduces his family set-up of both young and old to care for
2.30 Tony introduces his family set-up of both young and old to care for
3.39 Good for grand children to interact with grand parents
5.00 Main concerns and worries of caregiving (less financial)
6.00 Engaging in prehab to help with knee pain and mobility
7.39 Falling is a key worry that Alex has for his parents
8.45 Tony addresses caregiver stress
9.20 Tony’s parents help out with caregiving of his children
10.15 Regular check-ins with parents is important
10.50 In the work that Tony does, financial stress on caregivers is normally the main issue that is being faced
12.00 Extended family nucleus is a great support system
12.25 Leadership is walking the talk as a good role model for children to see how we interact with our own parents
13.29 Is it more stressful to live with an extended family?
15.25 Respect for the parents we live with
16.30 How do we prepare and nurture our own children to be respectful and tolerant of living in an extended family nucleus when it is their turn to start a family
18.03 Communication with your spouse is the start of harmony
18.50 Only after the birth of Alex’s daughter did, he start thinking and moving forward as a family unit
21.21 Inter-relational dynamics is more helpful than it is stressful
21.55 Resilience is about managing healthy relationships within the household
23.50 Resilience is about living harmoniously together
25.05 Are we preventing our parents from providing what they see as caregiving for them to us (even as adults)?
26.35 Speaking about sustainability in a situation where an elder has to be sent to a nursing home
27.00 How do we deal with guilt on not able to provide for our parents?
29.00 Up to a point where basic medical needs cannot be handled by a helper
29.30 What is the best care we can provide to maintain the quality of life? These conversations must happen way ahead of time
31.45 Top concern for parenting would be discipline and identifying teachable moments for values education and academic education
32.50 Is it the responsibility of the parent to ensure that the child gets a head start in a good primary school?
34.00 Anxiety of parents have towards child’s interactions in school are picked up by the child and can affect how the child views certain experiences and activities
37.00 What do we focus on as parents?
38.00 Values-based approach towards education and not task or success driven
39.00 Different stages of adulthood influence the way we parent and this also changes from the first child to the next
41.15 Involve your first-born in helping you parent your next-born to bond and train your children
44.00 Dynamic changes as you have more children and parenting will need to change with different nurturing techniques
48.45 You cannot turn back time so we try to make the best of our time
